Coffee, Kask, and the secret of Harrek

From: Erik Sieurin <BV9521_at_utb.hb.se>
Date: Wed, 22 Nov 1995 12:50:52 +0100


Hmmm..... maybe Lord Death on a Horse DO drink coffee - he has partaken too much of that primal darkness, so that he dare not go to sleep. That's why they tap the peasants - they need the FP (remember that if you use the "classic" Tap description, you can sack someone's INT and POW for FP?) so that LDoaH can stay awake (all the Tappers, who in my SERIOUS opinion are one type of "special command", trained in other forms of sorcery as well, channel the FP into LDoaH so that he doesn't have to go to sleep).
Thus the solution to the problem of KoW lies, of course, in the hands of the pacifist Chalana Arroy, who must cast ONE HECK OF A BOOSTED "SLEEP" SPELL on LDoaH.
Then, when he starts dreaming, the BAD things start to happen.

Now, as a Devotee of Primal Coffee, there are things that even I fear. Well, there are the accursed abominations like cafe au lait and so on, but they are merely disgusting, like watching a ghoul eat, not horrifying, like watching ME eat.
But then there is Kask. Kask is an invention by the Wolf Pirates of Ygg, who knew all about Coffee since long ago, since it was the secret which Ygg, ancestor of Kings, used to defeat Valind his Father and gain the Crown of Mastery. Ygg learnt about coffee from High King Elf, of course.
But Kask is another matter. Kask is an equal mixture of coffee in its primal form and the primal form of Fire Within Water, ie alcohol as pure as possible. The latter is an old Godlearner secret connected with the Firebergs, and was probably discovered by the HeroQuesting Harrek the Berserk. When he joined up with the Wolf Pirates, he fused the secret rituals of Firewater, WHICH MAKES YOU GO TO SLEEP if you drink enough, with Primal Coffee, WHICH KEEPS YOU AWAKE INDEFINITELY, if you drink enough. The paradox of what happens when you drink so much Kask that you can neither sleep nor stay awake is to horrible to contemplate, and may indeed explain the statements about Harrek being the greatest Dreamer of the third age, etc etc.

And guess what the secret of staying awake all winter that the Rathori held was? The secret stolen from the White Bear by Harrek? Obviously, the name of TWB is really an euphemism, like when the Greeks had a nice name for those horrible vengeful spirits (errynies? errinous? SP??) . It should be the Black Bear, the Bear Blacker Than Night With Red  Glowing Eyes. The Coffee Bear, that is.

Now, stay away from Kask. But please partake of the Primal Coffee!

Erik Sieurin


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