The 12 Plays of Trollball

From: John Hughes <nysalor_at_...>
Date: Thu, 18 Apr 2002 20:18:44 +1000


Bad filk songs? It must be friday. :) Well, not quite, but I've found an old friend I thought lost, and I'd like to share it. Just in time for the European live-action trollball season...

The Twelve Plays of Trollball
(The Bhagwhan Song)

Uz are intrinsically musical, a race of night clubbers always ready to give you a good drumming. I am pleased to share the infamous trollball chant of Bhagwhan's Broobashers, who aren't a hero band, but should be. "Come the night, Bhagwhan fight! We smash those Sazdorf Wackers And Tacklers any time..."

To the tune (and I use the term loosely) of "The Twelve Days of Christmas". And I defy anyone to get to the end without stumbling.

[If you go to to Questlines:

http://home.iprimus.com.au/pipnjim/questlines/questlines.html

you can sing along to the midi tune.]

On the first play of trollball, the giant referee, Kicked a ber-serk Zorak Zorani!

On the second play of trollball, the giant referee, Kicked two scrawny enlo, and a ber-serk Zorak Zorani!

[Okay, even a stoopid hooman should get the idea. But since we're dark trolls, I'll continue to spell it out... ]

On the third play of trollball, the giant referee, Kicked three uzko blockers, two scrawny enlo, And a ber-serk Zorak Zorani!

On the fourth play of trollball, the giant referee, Kicked four Gor-a-kiki, three uzko blockers, two scrawny enlo, And a ber-serk Zorak Zorani!

On the fifth play of trollball, the giant referee kicked
"I thought we won?"

Four Gor-a-kiki, three uzko blockers, two scrawny enlo, And a ber-serk Zorak Zorani!

[Now pay attention ladies. This new line gets changed a lot each time it's sung, so be careful. You can improvise, like youse always do in a big fight. Just remember, no one eats before they chants the song all the way through, and proper like, no mumblin'...]

On the sixth play of trollball, the giant referee Kicked six homboboboms...
"What's, there to eat?"

Four Gor-a-kiki, three uzko blockers, two scrawny enlo, And a ber-serk Zorak Zorani!

On the seventh play of trollball, the giant referee Kicked seven trollkin burgers, six homboboboms...
"Bladger, my axe!"

Four Gor-a-kiki, three uzko blockers, two scrawny enlo, And a ber-serk Zorak Zorani!

On the eighth play of trollball, the giant referee Kicked eight jars of POWZIE, seven trollkin burgers, six homboboboms...
"Say, something here!"

Four Gor-a-kiki, three uzko blockers, two scrawny enlo, And a ber-serk Zorak Zorani!

On the ninth play of trollball, the giant referee Kicked nine spi-der masters, eight jars of POWZIE, Seven trollkin burgers, six homboboboms...
"Do I, say it now?"

Four Gor-a-kiki, three uzko blockers, two scrawny enlo, And a ber-serk Zorak Zorani!

On the tenth play of trollball, the giant referee Kicked ten gi-ant maggots, nine spi-der masters, eight jars of POWZIE, Seven trollkin burgers, six homboboboms...
"Live trollkin please!"

Four Gor-a-kiki, three uzko blockers, two scrawny enlo, And a ber-serk Zorak Zorani!

On the 'leventh play of trollball, the giant referee Kicked 'leven Umbar mindlinks, ten gi-ant maggots, nine spi-der masters, Eight jars of POWZIE, seven trollkin burgers, six homboboboms...
"Who's clubbing now?"

Four Gor-a-kiki, three uzko blockers, two scrawny enlo, And a ber-serk Zorak Zorani!

On the twelfth play of trollball, the giant referee Kicked twelve Sons of Karg, 'leven Umbar mindlinks, ten gi-ant maggots, Nine spi-der masters, eight jars of POWZIE, seven trollkin burgers, Six homboboboms...
"I've lost my place!"

Four Gor-a-kiki, three uzko blockers, two scrawny enlo, And a ber-serk Zorak Zorani!

Trollball. Find the true poetry that dwells in the heart of an Uz, give it a good bashing, then eat it.

Cheers

John



nysalor_at_... John Hughes
Questlines: http://home.iprimus.com.au/pipnjim/questlines/

First mind you steer clear of those Uz grogging huts, For they'll sell you Powzie that rots out your guts - A drink that would eat the raw bronze from your butts - Its no good for the brave Lunar soldier.

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