> From: James Frusetta <gerakkag_at_wam.umd.edu>
> Date: Sat, 12 Apr 1997 15:53:13 -0400 (EDT)
> Subject: Nasty, dirty, vile, evil, commie Elves
Hohoho! Veeeery good, veeery good. I always assume that it's the old
Tolkien Clone Syndrome (known as TCS) which makes people think of
Elves as "nice". (Yeah, read Silmarillion closely, and you won't
think of them as "nice" anymore, even in Middle-Earth.)
A minor quibble, though:
> As such, Elves are expansionistic baddies who seek to undermine the
> natural modes of non-Elven order and replace it with their own! All
> non-Elves learn to become one with the forest or serve to feed it -- whe=
re
> do you think all those people in Fronela will go? That's right --
> fertilizer!
"Now, I think we can preserve at least 10-15% of the human population
as hunter-gatherers. This of course depends on the figures for other
predators. This requires re-education and anti-technological
deprogramming, of course."
>From the Collected Speeches of Holtman Plow, aka Plow's Little Green
Lore-Tree.
> James Wadsley wrote:
> >If Elves must heavily exploit a plant species, I expect it
> >involves raiding other territories. IMO, an Elf may well look on
> >warped trees that produce trinkets full time as modern people look on
> >child labourers sewing Nikes.
>
> Unless, of course, Elves honestly believe that the proper purpose of a
> trinket-growing tree is to produce trinkets, and that having it make mor=
e
> trinkets makes it happier. Or that ordering the extermination of a
> particular species of weed is really a good thing, because it makes the
> overall forest stronger. Etc., etc.
"The Trees are the Purpose of The Forest. The Welfare of the Trees
must always be the foremost concern to the People of The Trees.
However, the Forest cannot exist as Trees only. Thus, the Welfare of
the Trees, and thus that of the Forest, is utterly dependent on the
Non-Trees.
But the Peoples of the Non-Trees must be kept firmly in check. Their
Purpose is to make the Forest possible. The Purpose of the Forest is
to make the Trees possible. The Purpose of the Trees, is Existence."
>From the Little Green Lore-Tree of Holtman Plow.
"No problem, friend. I can get you the Man-Eating moss and the Fire Nuts anytime, if you just come up with that high-phosphorus-content dung. Hey, this is the Free Market of the humans, OK?" Gutterweed, Garden Black Marketeer Runner, Old Pavis
"The lesser non-coniferous races must be made extinct. This is the fullfillment of the Destiny of The Forest. The Spruce must rule by virtue of its natural superiority. We must achieve our rightful rootspace.
...
The non-trees are of no importance. Some, like the Blueberry Pixies
and the Totem of the Arctic Hare, are tied by Aldrya to our Destiny
as our servant races. The others are part of the non-coniferous
system, of the Great Leaf Conspiracy. They will be naturally
eradicated as a part of the final solution to the non-coniferous
problem."
Needler, Vronkali Elf-King
"Please, don't give me any of that crap about fascist spruces.
Everyone with any sense of history knows that Needler was of the
Juniper Clan - not a Spruce at all."
Tallbeam, Spruce Aldryami
"The Owl and the Pussycat went to sea, in a beautiful pea-green boat..."
>From "The Owl and the Pussycat" by Edward Lear
Erik Sieurin
bv9521_at_utb.hb.se
Bodagatan 39, 2 tr
50742 Bor=E5s
Sweden
033/141731
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