<< The question is quite simple. Arrange equal (large) numbers of Lunar regulars and Fyrd/weaponthanes in a (reasonably) open field, for a set piece battle. Who do you expect to win? Why? >>
What's all this guff about whether the Orlanthi are better than the Lunars or not? Hah! The answer is obvious: put 'em up against a proper army like we have in Loskalm and we'd kick both their arses! Oh yes, can't see a bunch of pagan blue-painted nudists lasting long against the flower of Loskalmi chivalry...
STAY IN STEP WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK THIS IS A PICNIC?! And those Lunars aren't much better. Infantry's a wonderful thing, served in it myself, but those legions they're so proud of will shatter before a proper cavalry charge, let me tell you. Antelope lancers? Don't talk to me about antelope lancers, what bloody use is an antelope against a horse? And those ones riding the giant chickens are just bloody ridic...
LEFT RIGHT LEFT RIGHT WHAT DID I TELL YOU AND HOLD THAT SPEAR PROPERLY
PERKINS ITS NOT A BLOODY PITCHFORK!!
No those cossacks are just undisciplined yobs. Run away soon as they're properly threatened, you mark my words. Now, militia we were talking about weren't we? No, I don't care if they do call it a furd, they should learn to speak proper Loskalmi like what we do! Bloody foreigners. See we've got proper militia here, gives the farmers a chance to show off their patriotism, you see. Do what's right by king and country.
MILITIA COMPANY HALT! ATTENTION!
That's where I come in, training this bunch how to defend their country if it comes to it. All properly organised by the squire and his lordship the mayor. That's what you foreign pagan types don't understand you see. Proper organisation. No the Lunars are *not* organised. Different kit and regulations in each bloody regiment. What good's that going to do you I ask? No sense of unity, these foreigners, that's their problem.
ALRIGHT MEN STAND AT EASE NOT THAT MUCH AT EASE PERKINS DO IT PROPERLY!! Makes the heart proud seeing a proper squad of infantry parading. I'll turn this bloody shower into a proper unit yet, you'll see. Even if they do go home to their cabbages for the rest of the week. Dedication and patriotism, see? And they know that they can get promotion if they do their job well, not like those Lunars who bribe their way to the top. And the Heortlings don't even have a bloody rank system far as I can see, how's that going to inspire people? No they didn't select me as a knight, that's why I pensioned out as... well, they said I didn't have the right attitude if you must know. Shouted too much they said. Can't imagine where they got...
SILENCE IN THE RANKS STOP THAT BLOODY SNIGGERING OR I'LL HAVE YOUR GUTS
Er, anyway, the point is, that's why we Malkioni always win against the likes of... no the Lunars defeating the Carmanians does *not* count. They're heretics and just don't do it properly. And, well, yes, alright but they cheated. There are proper rules in war, you know. Oh, but we'll know better than to do that next time, yes, sir. Magic? Hah! They just use some pagan mumbo-jumbo not proper sorcery like our wizards. Ever seen a bunch of grand knights charging forward with all their magic readied? You won't see anything like that among your foreign types, and that's a fact.
DON'T PICK YOUR NOSE ON PARADE YOU 'ORRIBLE LITTLE MAN IF ALL THE OTHERS
CAN DO IT PROPERLY WHY CAN'T YOU?!
Yes, but they're *other* Malkioni. We Loskalmi are God's chosen people. Says so right here in the book. Can't argue with that. Only stands to reason. You'll see what happens when we face the Kingdom of War. They'll be singing a different tune then, you mark my words. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have work to be getting back to...
RIGHT LETS DO IT AGAIN AND WE'LL KEEP ON DOING IT UNTIL WE CAN ALL GET IT
RIGHT MILITIA COMPANY BY THE RIGHT...
God King Gundreken!
End of The Glorantha Digest V8 #149
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