Cora and the Mooncats
--Grandpa, grandpa tell us another story.
Puhleeze, please, please!
--Huh, whazzat, whaddaya want? Oh, it's
you lot. What is it now.
--Another story Grandpa, another story.
--[Sigh] Oh okay. What'll it be this time?
Another account of my great exploits or
those of the legendary heroes I used to
adventure with?
--No, grandpa. --Then what? --Tell us another story about Cora Two-mouth. --What! You little perverts, get outta here. --[Angelic smiles] Ah, Grandpa, you tell thebestest stories.
Cora was in a big hurry. She hadn't planned on
spending so much time on lunch but a girl's gotta
eat. Moonson himself was waiting for her and
He didn't care to be kept waiting. She remembered
hearing about the last person who'd kept Moonson
waiting too long and she didn't like to ponder on
such unpleasantness. She was currently Moonson's
favorite but she knew all too well how that was likely
to change at the drop of a tasseled pair of undies.
(The sort Uleria Herself might have worn). She raced
down corridors and up corridors holding her gold
sandals in her left hand running like only a farm girl
(which she used to be) or a whore in a hurry (which
she considered herself now to be) could go. Caution
and decorum to the winds she thought I's just gotta
reach the Silent Throne room before Moonson does
or my ass will be grass. She raced down the hallways
yelling, "Gangway, Moonson's whore comin'
through!" Servants and functionaries scattered left
and right to get out of her way. Most of them,
eunuchs excepted, stopped to stare after her as she
disappeared down the hallway. Finally she
reached the hallway the Silent Throne room
was off of and the guards at the door yelled,
"Halt, who goes there!" She yelled, "No time
to chit chat fellers, its me, Cora", and she
vaulted over their crossed rhomphias and
through the open door. She slid across the
polished floor up to her spot beside the throne,
slapped her sandals onto her feet and tried to
compose herself. Just in time, she thought, as
she heard the sound of the ceremonial cistras
that always preceded Moonson wherever he
went. She dropped prostate to the floor and
lay there panting, her chest heaving as
Moonson's procession came through the door.
All the eyes that were free to, or at all interested
looked at her as she lay there.
"Late again, Cora?" asked Moonson as He a
scended to the throne.
"No, Your Imperial Majesty, just plum afire
with passion at muh proximity to Yourself."
she replied quivering inside at the absence of the
dear Moonson usually tacked onto her name.
"Indeed," Moonson snorted, "We will talk about
it later my dear, now stand up and look as fetching
as you can." He paused,"You know We think the
sweat actually helps. Be late next time as well."
Cora gave a deep mental sigh of relief and
promised to let herself collapse later when she
got the chance. He usually asked her to attend
an audience when he wanted her present to
distract some embassador or bigwig. She got
bored at these things pretty fast. It wasn't that
they weren't interesting or nuttin', she thought,
it was just that she really had no input or say
so it didn't really matter to her what happened.
Things would happen or they wouldn't and
nothing a farm girl or a whore had to say would
make the least lick of difference. She just had
to stand there wearin' a skimpy outfit and make
googly eyes at whoever Moonson wuz talkin' to.
She was wondering who the fella was she was to
flirt with today when she heard a ruckus comin'
up the hallway toward the throne room. She
heard guards shouting "You can't go in there!"
followed by shrieks of pain and a deep, rich,
unmistakable female voice saying, "Oh really?"
Moonson's left eyebrow raised a fraction.
In stalked Great Sister dragging a haggard
looking man behind her. She tossed the man
to the ground and had started into the abbreviated
version of the seven prostrations and three
salutations she was permitted as Moonson's
relative when He gestured impatiently for her
to skip them.
"What is it? I have an important audience
coming up."
"Moonson they are gone," said Great Sister.
"What's gone?" asked Moonson irritably.
"The mooncats from the Glass Menagerie."
"Oh?", said Moonson raising his eyebrow a
fraction higher than it had been a moment before.
"Yes, this wretch," she said pointing to the man s
he had tossed to the ground who Cora now
recognized as the Keeper of the Menagerie ,
"tells me the cats have been gone for two whole
days!"
"Hmmm," said Moonson, "that's rather unfortunate
considering their fondness for human flesh. Can
you tell Us why you neglected to inform
anyone of their escape before now?"
The keeper went through the seven prostrations
and three salutations, timidly raised his head
and said in a quivering voice, "I was afraid."
"Afraid!" shouted Great Sister striking the man
and sending him skidding across the marble floor.
"Afraid of what?"
Showing a degree of bravery that Cora felt was
commendable but extremely foolhardy the
keeper whispered "That someone would do
that." Unfortunately for him the excellent
acoustics of the Silent Throne room carried
the sound to Great Sister's ears and she was
about to pounce on the hapless keeper when
Moonson raised his hand.
"Enough. We do not have time for
recriminations right now. The proper agents
will investigate the keeper's conduct and
make a report to me.
The keeper turned as white as the prophesised
Moon at the mention of the proper agents
investigating his actions and fainted dead
away. Great Sister sighed in exasperation
and dragged the man away by an ankle just
in time to clear the room before the expected
audience arrived.
After the audience was over Cora walked back
to her room thinking about the afternoon's events.
She'd never heard of these mooncats but then
she rarely had any time for such frivolities.
She pitied the poor keeper having to be subjected
to the not so tender mercies of the Grim Soldiers,
the proper agents Moonson had mentioned, the
agency responsible for the security of Glamour.
She decided to pay the Glass Menagerie a visit
the following day since she didn't have anything
on her schedule and see what she could learn
about these mooncats. The next day she got up
bright and early (just before lunch time), did her
devotions to Moonson and Uleria and headed
out of the palace towards the Glass Menagerie.
The Glass Menagerie was the place where
creatures from all over Glorantha and even
from the Red Moon Itself were collected and
displayed for the delight of residents of Glamour
and visitors alike. Not having ever been to the
Glass Menagerie she had to ask the gate guards
for directions which they were more than happy
to provide.
Cora enjoyed walking the streets of Glamour
and never grew jaded at the fact that in this of a
ll cities a naked virgin with a sack of gold could
wander the streets in perfect safety. (She didn't
really qualify for that description since she was
certainly no virgin, didn't have a sack of gold
(on her person) and would have only qualified
as naked in the more uptight parts of the Empire).
She marveled at the diverse and colourful crowds
she passed and thanked the Goddess yet again that
she was lucky enough to live in the most wondrous
city on Glorantha. Fortunately she had been in
Glamour a while (not to mention having visiting
the Moon Itself once, as well as having been in
the City of Dreams a number of times) so she was
spared having to wander around jaw agape like
so many of the tourists she saw. Since she was
thirsty she bought a fruit ice from a street vendor
and greedily gobbled it down. A little while
later she regretted having done that as she soon
felt a strong need to empty her bladder. She
hated using the public facilities which were
mostly staffed with broos because like most
country folk she just couldn't overcome her
inbred aversion to Chaos and hated getting
that close to a broo. She hurried her pace and
hoped that she might use the staff facilities at
the Menagerie which hopefully would be staffed
by humans. After a brisk walk she reached the
park where the Glass Menagerie was housed
and turned in at the gates. She walked towards
a very bored and oafish looking attendant
leaning on a broom who suddenly became much
more attentive (but no less oafish) at the sight
of a beautiful, scantily dressed woman in the
colours of the Imperial household and said,
"Pardon me fellah but could you tell a girl
where the Menagerie is? Plus could you tell
me where I's could go and powder my nose
around here?"
The attendant looked puzzled and said, "Huh,
youse wants to put powder on yer nose?"
"No, no. It's a eu-phee-missim for using the
facilities."
"What's a you-fee-whatzit? And wut's a
fah-ci-li-tees?", said the attendant looking
even more confused and oafish.
Cora sighed and decided to try the direct
approach, "Ah needs to take a piss."
"Oh, fur cryin' out loud, why didn't you say
that in the first place. Plenty of bushes around
here."
Cora's drew herself up straight, narrowed her
eyes and looked down the length of her
perfect nose at him.
The attendant felt a chill and hastily said, "But
mebbe a fine lady likes yurself don't piss out of
doors."
"Not anymore," agreed Cora.
The attendant quickly gave Cora directions to
the proper facilities and much to Cora's relief
there were no broos in sight. She quickly
attended to her business and feeling much
better left the facility to head over to the
Menagerie. As she was leaving she heard a
faint mewing sound. She looked around and
located where the sound was coming from a
clump of bushes. She crawled under the b
ushes and amidst the litter left by visitors to
the park she discovered a tiny kitten tangled
in the string of someone's discarded macrame
bikini top. He, Cora quickly verified, was a
scruffy looking little tabby covered with dust
and mud.
"What are y'all doing here li'l critter?" she
cooed as she slowly untangled the kitten.
The kitten swiped at her with its paws and
drew some blood.
"Goldarnit!", she yelped and dragging the
kitten out of the bushes she stuck her face
right in its. "Listen here varmint, there's
plenty more where youse came from so
smarten up! Anymore of that there nonsense
and I's a gonna toss you back into them thar
bushes. Kapish? "
The kitten gazed into her eyes and perhaps
sensing she meant business mewed plaintively.
At this Cora melted and put the kitten into her
carryall saying, "When I's gets youse home
I'll fix you a right nice snack." Cora had a
bit of a snack she'd packed for herself in c
ase she got hungry; two of the Emperor's
favorite type of sausages, some green cheese,
a couple of tomatoes, a loaf of bread, some
butter in a stoneware jar, another jar of
sardines, some potato salad, a bottle of wine,
and another of water, as well as a jam buster
for dessert, so she gave the kitten some of the
sardines to keep him quiet. He quickly gobbled
them down and promptly fell asleep.
Cora made her way to the Menagerie where she
quickly spotted the Keeper looking somewhat
the worse for wear after his "interview" with
the Grim Soldiers. He recognized Cora from
the throne room and made a great fuss of
welcoming her and showing her where his
office was. He sat her down in his own
chair and offered her something to drink.
She turned him down and offered to share
her lunch with him. He reluctantly accepted
but his reluctance quickly disappeared when
he saw the dainties she was offering. The
pair sat and ate and made small talk. Cora
learned that the Grim Soldiers decided that
the Keeper had been stupid and perhaps
negligent in letting the mooncats escape
without telling anyone but that he hadn't
been acting in a treasonous fashion in doing
so. It had been decided that his interrogation
was a sufficient punishment for what he had
done. (He said this while spitting blood out
from between his missing teeth so Cora
guessed this was true).
After they ate Cora asked him if he could show
her where the mooncats had been housed since
she was so interested. The Keeper showed her
the enclosure where the cats had been and she
marveled at the height of the transparent wall.
"You mean they's jumped that ther wall!?!
Why it must be ten meters tall!"
"I am afraid so. We quite underestimated their
ability to jump. If only we had told someone
when the kitten had disappeared."
"Kitten?", asked Cora.
"Yes, we had moved the adults to another
enclosure so that we could clean this one and
I guess we both, human and cat alike assumed
that their kitten had gone with them.
Unfortunately it seems the kitten stayed behind
and wandered off while the enclosure
was open."
"What do these mooncats look like anyway?"
"Oh, somewhat like the cats the Orlanthi
barbarians favor, but much more noble looking
and regal in manner. Their fur is a lovely
shade of red. They're quite large, about the
size of a horse and their eyes have the power
to drive mortals mad. Oh, and they have a
large, beautiful tail, not the ugly little stub
the barbarian cats have. Unfortunately they
also seem to have something of a taste for
human flesh. Fortunately no one seems to
have been killed by them so far but I'm sure
that can't last since it's been quite a while
since they ate. Again, unfortunately they're
quite cunning, almost Lunar in intelligence
so it may take the Hunter Corps quite some
time to catch them. The Emperor has issued
orders that they must not be killed so it could
be quite the feat to capture them.
Cora thanked the Keeper for his time and he
thanked her for the honor of her company and
for sharing her lunch with him. She left the
Menagerie and headed back to the Ciradel for
lunch. On the way back she heard from ahead
of her an ever increasing amount of noise which
she soon realized included screams of terror
and shrieks of alarm. Curious, she turned the
corner from the peaceful street she was on to
a scene straight out of some hell. The alley in
front of her was littered with rubble and bodies.
Some street vendor's stalls had been completely
flattened with all of their goods scattered all
over the alley. The vendor's bodies lay in the
rubble and more body parts littered the street.
A small detachment of Grim Soldiers were
gathered at the far end of the alley. Three of
their number lay on the ground in pieces before
them and they were visibly trying to steel
themselves for another attack. Cora looked
around for their attacker or attackers and
couldn't see them right away. One of the
Grim Soldiers spotted her and yelled at her,
"Flee while you can in the Name of the
Goddess!"
"What is it," asked Cora, "what's gone and
happened?"
Just then her question was answered when a
giant reddish feline landed right in front of
her, lifted its head to the Moon and roared.
"Oh," squeaked Cora, "that's what happened."
Cora decided that she might as well die well
as the giant cat was joined by its mate. She
spread her arms apart, threw her head back
and said, "If you has to eat me then go ahead
and eats me. Just make it quick." The larger
of the pair of cats had moved closer, opening
its massive jaws and started to swallow Cora's
head when it stopped and sniffed at Cora. It
gave out an interrogatory rumble which was
answered by a faint meow from inside Cora's
carryall. Cora said, "You don't mean..." and
moving very slowly she reached into her carryall
and lifted the kitten out. The huge cat sniffed the
tiny kitten and gently picked it up in its mouth.
Cora sighed and wiped the sweat off of her
forehead. The larger cat turned with the kitten
in its mouth and went over to the smaller cat.
The pair seemed to communicate somehow
with the kitten and Cora could have sworn that
the kitten looked abashed. The smaller cat
picked the kitten up while the larger cat turned
again to Cora. Cora gulped and was bracing
herself for destruction when the large cat licked
her face with its tongue which was the same
size as one of the imperial wash cloths. The
larger cat squatted before her and she said,
"Me?" The cat growled in assent and she
gingerly climbed on the cat's back. The cat
gracefully rose to its feet and accompanied
by the smaller cat the pair padded all the way
to the Citadel of Halfway along the busy streets
with Cora riding on the big cat's back. Crowds
soon lined the streets to gawk and cheer as Cora
and the mooncats moved along the streets,
giving the foursome plenty of space of course.
Eventually they reached the Citadel of Halfway.
The guards at the entrance moved to stop them
but Cora's cry of "No" and the great cats growls
made them fall back. They walked past the
guardsmen at the entrance and strode through
the hallways up to the entrance of the City of
Dreams. There waited the masked and grim
Hell Sisters. The female cat gazed at the Hell
Sister in charge and some communication
seemed to pass between the pair. The Sisters
let them through and they traveled down the
hallways and through the streets of the City of
Dreams until they reached Moonson's presence.
(Cora had no idea how the Mooncats managed
to find Moonson, they just seemed to know
where he was). The two adults plopped
themselves down in His presence and looked
expectantly at him. Moonson's left eyebrow
rose up to his hairline at the sight.
"Well," he said.
"Your Imperial Majesty, I thinks they wants
to go home."
"You know Cora I think you are correct."
Moonson issued orders for the Gates to the
Silver Bridge to be opened. Moonson took
Cora's arm and strode with her to the Ante-chamber
of the Moon. The mooncats rose up and followed
them. At the Ante-chamber the cats stared deep
into Moonson's eyes and then gave out mighty
roars, licked Cora's hands and walked up the
Bridge to the Moon.
Cora said, "I think they'll be happier up there."
Moonson replied, "So will we all We imagine."
--Okay kids, that's it story's over go away and let an old, old man sleep.
Oliver D. Bernuetz
www.geocities.com/TimesSquare/realm/5545
bernuetz.oliver_at_cbsc.ic.gc.ca
End of The Glorantha Digest V6 #15
Powered by hypermail